"It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves."

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Self Growth : Taming Anger



As mentioned in my previous post, Self Growth is one of my many endeavors I want to explore as much as I can. Though I have shared a few articles here and there, from now onwards I will be doing it on a more regular basis.

I came across this fantastic article on getting a grip on our anger. Though I strongly suggest reading the full article, here is an excerpt which is super useful for me and should be for you too -


"

There’s now widespread agreement among anger experts that it’s better to evaluate angry feelings before acting on or even accepting them. Williams is a leading proponent of this view; he recommends asking yourself four specific questions whenever you feel angry:

  1. Is the situation or event that triggered my anger important? That is, is the thing that triggered my rage something that threatens my well-being?
  2. Given the situation or event, is my anger appropriate? Faced with the same circumstances, would the average person get angry?
  3. Is the situation modifiable? Is there something I can do to change it for the better?
  4. Is it worth it to try to modify the situation? That is, is it worth my time and effort?
"

Source for the above excerpt.

So next time you get angry or are on the verge of getting, ask yourself the above 4 questions.


@|b

3 comments:

Josh Corken said...

Really helpful post. Precise and to the point. I'm always trying to ask myself those questions when I get mad, but sometimes it is hard.

A friendly reminder never hurts.

Maulik said...

Have you heard of Vipassana? It's a form of meditation technique. It talks about being aware of your inside so that you are aware of feelings before they surface. And for anger this is very important. I am no expert but I attended their one 10 day course and it helped me.

@b said...

@Maulik - Yes I have heard of Vipassana, but not many people will be willing or will have time to do this since its a 10 day course and it may not be available in their region.

I wanted to share something, which is more shorter and immediate remedy for at least short term. And once you do something regular, it become long term.

I have myself experienced that asking the questions mentioned above, I am able to think in a different perspective and my anger is tamed to a considerable extent.